Raquel Monterrey
I spoke with the spirit of my child before my abortion. That spirit who was outside of me told me that it wasn't ready to be born on Earth again. That it just wanted to know what it felt like to be loved by two parents and that's why it chose us. Although the 3 days of knowing I was pregnant were the most blissful days of my life I also knew that now wasn't the right time. I received the go ahead and confirmation of my child's spirit that it was not within me and that it was okay to have the abortion. I felt resolved. However it was the after effects that took a year to heal. I went through a grieving process not only for my unborn child in this lifetime but in all my past lifetimes in which I lost my child. I realized that this decision was part of my mission here on Earth. To help women who are moving through the pain after abortion. To assist them in finding their voice. To let them know that they are not alone, that they didn't do anything wrong and their decision is valid and honored. My mission is to support women in reconnecting to their intuition, power and wisdom. All of which is all challenged by society after choosing an abortion. I want women to stand up with each other and hold hands in support. We owe it to ourselves, this planet and our unborn children.
2014 United States
Although I felt confident and sure that this was the right decision for me I also grieved the loss of my potential child. And part of me felt that I didn't deserve to grieve. Once I allowed myself to grieve and move through the grieving process I began to heal and have a greater understanding of the reason this pregnancy occurred when it did.
My experience taking the pills was difficult. After the first round of pills I immediately felt the life force that was in my body for 7 weeks dim into darkness. I felt death within my womb where as it's meant for a place of creative life force. That is when I began to grieve. When I took the second round of pills my partner decided to leave work early so he could be with me. And I am so grateful he did. The pain from the cramping was nearly unbearable and I was thankful he was there to monitor the pain medication for me, bring me water, hold my hair back as I threw up and reheat my heating pad as needed.
I knew in my soul that this abortion was the right decision.
Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?
N/A
How did other people react to your abortion?
They were extremely supportive. And it also allowed them to share their story as well.