Marie
I had an abortion. It's a choice I want available for every woman, for whatever reason they feel, because it's our bodies and our lives.
2007 United States (born in United States)
The second I saw the double line on the pregnancy test, I was on the internet researching my abortion options. There was never a doubt in my mind, and I am completely unapologetic for it. In this world full of starving, abused, unloved, uneducated, or unwanted children, I could never in good conscience contribute to the problem. I don't feel there is anything that should make a woman who chooses an abortion to feel guilty, ashamed or selfish.
Honestly, it was kind of surreal. I figured out I was pregnant nearly instantly, so the pregnancy was mere weeks along. When I was forced to endure a vaginal ultrasound and see the images, I was able to just see a cluster of cells. With the anesthesia, everything happened in a blink. I didn't really have any pain at all afterward, just some weirdness from the anesthesia. I chose the surgical abortion because I didn't want to risk an incomplete abortion with pills that would require surgical follow up.
I had never planned on having children in the first place. When I got pregnant, I had just bought a house and money was incredibly tight. I was going to school full-time AND working full-time. I had been with my boyfriend for just a few months, and we had a birth control failure. I was so unprepared to have a child and in the middle of working so hard to develop my education, career, and financial future. A child would have literally ruined all of that for me, in addition to keeping me tied to a man I would not have considered marrying for the rest of our lives.
Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?
It made the situation easier in that I was able to handle my pregnancy the way I chose without risking my health, safety, or anything else. I'm not sure what I could have done if I could not safely, easily, and legally access abortion, which is why I will always do everything I can to help support that right for women everywhere.
How did other people react to your abortion?
I did not tell a lot of people. A few friends were very judgmental, which made the situation even more uncomfortable. My boyfriend at the time was as relieved as I was to have the choice that allowed both of us to continue our lives the way we wanted to. I think the situation turned him into a bit of a feminist, once he understood that the situations where abortions are considered are not black-and-white and easy.