i do love you my baby. but the moment now, is not right. i did this because i don't wanna world where i lived, hurt you. heaven is the right place for you. i love you, kaimeriana
2013
Indonesia
regret?? sure. for all the mistakes that i've done. all i can say is sorry and pray for my child.
i didn't feel cramp or pain from my stomach. bleeding was just happened. but the real pain that i felt is, when i realized, i killed my own first child with my hand. and i could do nothing about it. it feels like, i am a failed mom who can't protect her child.
i have to finish my school. and also, i have to protect my family's name.
Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?
sure. scared, panicked, sad, every negative feelings became one. deepest in my heart, i really wanna kept my baby alive. but, on the other side, i lived in a place that pregnant before married is unacceptable.
How did other people react to your abortion?
my boy friend, seems happy and realive that i did the abortion. but no one knows except god, me, and my bf. i couldn't tell my family what i've done to my first child. they will be dissapointed if they know it. and i won't tell them. maybe i'll keep this secret till i die.