Allison
My abortion was 100% my choice.
2014 Canada
My feelings about the abortion were both good and bad. I knew my decision was the right one for me and I never swayed from my decision in the weeks leading up to the abortion. At the same time, society places doubt and guilt on the shoulders of women who seek abortions. So many people worried that I would regret the choice later in life, encouraged me to just put the baby up for adoption, and did not consider the larger circumstances which made me pregnant in the first place.
I was surprised that I was kept awake for the abortion. From all of my readings online, I figured I would be put under and wake up when everything was over. At the same time, I was grateful to be conscious of the experience so I could understand exactly what was happening to me. It made me all the more aware of how routine an abortion is in my country and how safe the procedure is. I was too far along to use an abortion pill, so an extraction surgery was performed. Although the noise of the suction machine was upsetting and the cramping and devices used were uncomfortable, my experience was overall quite positive. The nursing staff at the hospital was incredibly kind and finally made me feel like I wasn't alone in my choice.
Does a woman really even have to justify her decision? I just prefer to say I have complete autonomy over my own body.
How did other people react to your abortion?
I found out I was pregnant at age 21 after a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship with an older man. I was taken advantage of, and found out I was pregnant as he returned home to his girlfriend who was also pregnant (who I did not know about until after our relationship ended). I was ill equipped to be a mother as a struggling student, I had no support from family or the father to raise the child, and I simply was not ready to be a mother. Although the above circumstances justify my choice (not that I have to justify it whatsoever, hello its my body!), I still found the people in my life to react negatively to my abortion. An abortion is still so taboo in Canadian society. One does not dare share the information openly, and pro-life protests still litter clinics and hospitals which perform abortions. Clinics still close across the country and governments still battle over funding. I was asked over and over if I was sure of my choice. I was looked at with pity and felt as though I should be ashamed. Although abortions are performed regularly in hospitals and clinics across the nation, I had never felt so alone and alienated in my entire life. I cannot imagine how a woman would have felt in a country where abortion is illegal. As is typical of Western societies, this quote from Saturday Night Live summarizes my feelings towards abortions and women's reproductive rights quite well: "If men could get pregnant, abortion clinics would be like Starbucks. There would be two on every block and four in every airport - and the morning after pill would come in different flavours like sea salt and cool ranch"