Vanessa

2005 United States

disappointed irresponsible selfish resolved numb relieved confused stupid ashamed sure guilty afraid sad

Some might say my SO talked me into it but it was more like he talked me out of making an un-fixable mistake. I always thought of kids as something a woman had to do as she grew up but once I sat down and really thought about it? I was never all that sure I ever wanted kids in the first place. Growing up thinking that being a mom was just what women did and then having to come to terms with the realization that that was not what the woman I became wanted at all soon enough to still be able to have a legal abortion caused some major internal turmoil and sure enough, there was some guilt. Even to this day I still think of how things might have been. But with every passing year I know more and more that I did the right thing; for myself, my partner, our very new relationship and the co-mingled DNA that, if I'm honest with myself, had the potential to become one seriously screwed up person having me as it's mother. If our spirits ever meet in another lifetime, I know it'll say thanks for saving me from that life. I will never be a mom and I'm fine with that and I hope to help as many women as possible realize they have that choice before they're stuck in a life they didn't want, with a child they weren't ever planning on.

with medicines

I only had to go to the clinic to pick up the medicines and take the first dose under medical supervision. I won't lie and say it wasn't painful, it was like the worst period cramps amplified to 11 for me but pain is also subjective.The tissue passed as nothing more recognizable than an extremely heavy period. 3 days of pain and exhaustion was absolutely,100% worth it.

financial issues my age (too young or old) problems with my relationship mental health reasons

How did other people react to your abortion?

My mom stood by my decision but told me to never tell anyone else the truth because they will judge me even if they've known me a million times longer than I was ever pregnant. My best friend saw right through the story I made up (she is also in the medical field) and didn't flinch. I'll always be grateful for her, she helped me to feel unashamed. The father, a casual fling at the time and now my long-term partner of 10 years, was my rock and my common sense when the brainwashed narrative I grew up hearing tried to win out. I had friends who were willing to share their stories and helped me realize that abortions are much more common than anyone would have you believe. I'm very lucky to have had the support I had.

legal

other