Fallen Angel

I had the SAFEST ABORTION even in the PHILIPPINES through womenonweb.org.

YOU CAN HAVE ONE, TOO.

2010 Philippines (born in Philippines)

grieving peaceful resolved relieved angry guilty afraid

At first, I was too stressed on how would I be able to pull the abortion off all by myself. I even doubted womenonweb on being genuine. But after I read some credentials, I started to trust them and since I didn't have any much of an option. I was angry when I got the package. MIxed feelings overwhemed me for I didn't know what I ready wanted to do that time but since the package REALLY arrived (and so that was a proof that womenonweb wasn't just taking money from me) it was a go-signal that I had to do it... the medical abortion. As I did the medical abortion, I was actually grieving as the first time I had a discharge I believe it was my baby, a small flesh colored one... I said sorry to him... I felt so selfish by the time... I cried uncontrollably during the process... After everything was done, I didn't really feel anything at first. I felt numb... I was oblivious to everything... But after a day or two, I felt relieved... Relieved that the medical abortion ended the way I pictured it to be; safe and discreet. After all the pain, the heartache and remorse, I felt peaceful as I said to myself, "Mas mabuti na muna na ganun ang nangyari... Kung tinuloy ko, parehas lang kami mahihirapan ng magiging anak ko... siguradong hindi ko siya mapapalaki ng maayos... Sobrang maghihirap lang kaming dalawa..." I actually did it for my baby... and not for me...

with medicines

I Took The medicine that I ordered from womenonweb. (1 tab Mifrepristone, 6 Tabs Misoprosol) It was Excruciating. The pain was intermittent. 30 minutes after I took the 4 tabs of Misoprosol in my buccal cavity, I threw up and had a painful diarrhea. It was excruciating to the point that I was immobilized for a while. Then after, I had bouts of painful (AS IN SOBRANG SAKIT!) cramping with discharge of big blood clots. The pain in the lower abdomen and the ejection of big blood clot lasted about 3 hours.

financial issues my age (too young or old) my personal reasons for not wanting a child mental health reasons

I was mentally ill. Plus the fact that I was in a condemning Christian community, i might as well kill myself rather than tell them I was pregnant and deem the rest of my life being condemned.

Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?

Somehow, it did. but I was more concerned on my future and the worst future of my supposed child if I kept him.

How did other people react to your abortion?

nobody knew about it

illegal

i have no children

Christianity