Lu

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Unexpected feelings

2019 United States

For an unexplainable reason I'm hurt by this loss. For some reason flushing down the toilet (literally), what could have been my baby felt wrong. I never dreamed I would think of an unthinking, unfeeling, thing the size of a raspberry, as .. . Deserving. As needing taken care of. As deserving not to be just thrown away. I totally respect everyone's choice but for some reason I grew an attachment to that thing inside of me. I knew I was pregnant before the missed period. I felt my body change and at first I felt punished. Trapped. scared. I was so worried about how to make it stop and get back to my old self I didn't realize I was also subconsciously feeling every second of that pregnancy. I guess it left some weird imprint on me. I don't know how to tell my partner that it still hurts me. He doesnt get it when I try to tell him that it was a huge experience for me and I need time to heal. I wish I was one of those people who just go on with their life like nothing happened but ive always been pretty sensitive

I had a medical abortion. With a heating pad and tramadol, the pain was bearable. The bleeding stopped after a week. Going back to work was extremely hard for me at first as my job is very physically demanding but I got through it.

Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?

The protesters who were outside of every clinic visit, yelling "repent" and "it's not too late" with their giant pictures of fetuses and whatnot. .. to the recent string of abortion/birth control bans and criminalization. I was so afraid I wouldn't have access to choice (I do thanks to the acula and pp and organizations like women have options who helped me AFFORD it). And after the abortion I feel less angry at those ignorant prolifers, I feel more.. grief. Which is their objective I'm sure. ..

How did other people react to your abortion?

Indifferent/ nonchalant. My partner and I have always agreed to an abortion in case an accident ever happened.. and it did. I'm not brave enough or ready to tell my mother. I need time. I never dreamed it would affect me this way. I drunkenly told one of my few female friends. I work in a male dominated field and most of my friends are male. I don't think any of them could react in a way that would be comforting or worth validation as they can't understand. So I haven't told anyone really. Guess that's why I'm here.

Paula

i had an abortion

Ma N

Y fue un proceso duro física y emocionalmente.

Sam

I had a Medical Abortion - Painful Experience, Life Changing

Lorena

Yo aborte por que decidí que no estaba lista para ser madre y por qué empiezo a…

Fallen Angel

I had the SAFEST ABORTION even in the PHILIPPINES through womenonweb.org.

Estefanía

Si se lo pudiera decir a alguien sin que me juzgue no me sentiría así

Ella

I was so scared but it was right and I know deep in my heart now.

Maree

It was sad but necessary

Sofia Ignatius

I had abortion n all went well

Bárbara

Fiz o procedimento ontem e quero contar com riqueza de detalhes , por isso…

deedee

한국에 계신 분들 걱정마십쇼!! 낙심하시 마시고 자신을 믿으세요!

Katarzyna

Nie mogłam mieć dziecka z kilku powodów: jeszcze się uczę, chłopak w ogóle nie…

keira

Chcę mieć kontrolę. Zrobiłam to i NIE ŻAŁUJĘ.

Wzięłam pierwszą tabletkę, czułam…

Jaq

I was 21, and nowhere near ready or willing to carry and birth a child because…

Luna

Fiz um aborto - E foi a melhor decisão que eu podia ter tomado para a minha…