Yana
I had an abortion-it was a difficult decision...
2008 Bahrain (born in United States)
Of course, I don't think any woman feels good about making a decision like this. Before I learned I was pregnant, I was very anti-abortion. It always happens that way until your in that situation. I thought I would never have to go through this...but regardless of my mistake, I came out of this a bit wiser and stronger. I don't want to make this mistake again, and am taking measures to do so. But it happened, and I made my decision based on my issues. Every woman needs to grieve in their own matter, but remember it doesn't make you less of a person for doing so. If anyone wants to judge, they have their right too, but keep your head up high. The person without sins can throw the first stone...and I don't think there is anyone that can do so. We all make mistakes, and go through tough times...we just have to keep looking up and moving forward. Your not alone.
Personally, it was rather painful. But don't be frightened. It was OK. It was expected that it wouldn't be easy, but it's like having a heavy period, and it's about two hours that the pain is really intense. I was very nervous and scared, and I felt like my world was coming to an end...but it didn't. It always turns out OK. I know it's going to be natural to feel scared, but there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Don't feel alone. It will all be OK.
Being in the military and being stationed overseas, it just would have turned my world upside down. Although the father was very supportive, it would have left so much uncertainty and there were other personal reason for not going along with it.
Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?
I am in the US Military, and stationed in this country next to Saudi Arabia. Here, it is completely unlawful to get an abortion, and will even be reported to the authorities if you go to a hospital asking for assistance in this. It was definetely unplanned, and if I would have gone with the pregnancy, I would have been out of here and stationed somewhere in the states. The father would have stayed in Bahrain and now sure where he would be headed after he finished his time. It was incredibly bad timing, and although many may see my decision selfish, I would have resented a lot of my choices and it was simply not the time for my to bring a child into this world. The father and I had meet about 3 months prior, and everything was very uncertain.
How did other people react to your abortion?
I have a small group of friends that were supportive. But overall, I was on my own with my partner.