Lindseymae Mckay

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My name is Lindseymae McKay. I will be 32 years old next week. I have a 6 year old son who is truly the only reason I breathe. I’ve had several abortions. None of which I have ever felt any guilt or remorse; in fact, all I ever felt was relief.
That was until my most recent procedure.
About a month ago I realized I was pregnant. I knew before I took a pregnancy test & knew that I would want an abortion. After the pee-stick confirmation at home, I took the next few necessary steps in scheduling my abortion appointment at the local clinic. I was early enough in the pregnancy to have the option of using the medical abortion versus the in-clinic, vacuum procedure (which really sucks, no pun intended). So about two weeks ago, I went to clinic, heard the same ole song-and-dance about when to take the pills, what to expect, what warning signs to be aware of, bla-bla-bla. As expected, it was a fairly painful ordeal with heavy bleeding, extreme discomfort, with a supportive and clueless partner by my side. Now, here I sit in my bathroom in the middle of the night, wondering if this HUGE bloody booger thing that just fell outta me is the unwanted fetus. It looks like a cranberry covered wonton that, seriously, has the classic fetus shape to it. Now- instead of just flushing it down the toilet, I carefully put it onto a piece of
Toilet paper and instantly went online googling what the
Possibilities were of this gory splotch being the thing I wanted out of me- and if so- why do I feel so guilty about it? Why am I sitting here holding my tears back examining this thing looking for little fingers or toes? What the hell is wrong with me? And now I get it. I’m human. Despite the relief I feel at knowing I’m not going to be having another child, I feel horribly irresponsible and overwhelmingly selfish. I am sure this will not last. At least I hope it doesn’t. I’m sharing this story hoping someone see will share something similar and make me
Feel like I’m less
Of a monster for doing this not once but several times.

2019 United States

Painful but effective

How did other people react to your abortion?

They encouraged it.

Lucille 2

I had an abortion. I got pregnant from a brief relationship and very…

Jora

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maria maria

No tome la mejor desición, hice lo que pude

Jess

This is something that was necessary for me but most definitely the hardest and…

Ale

Sin remordimientos

AS

I am having an abortion as I am writing this, at home with cytotec…

enfermera

Antes de hacer cualquier cosa infórmate muy bien para tomar la decisión…

Nadia

Le habia escrito una blanca cancion del amor entre una nube y un pez volador.

Pippa

I had 2 abortiona in the space of a year...

was 20 nearrly 21 i hadnt had a…

CJ Koivuniemi

I had an abortion. I was twenty years old and living in Ireland, a country…

Bree

It was the right decision just hard than i thought it would to deal with

Lila bleu

J’ai avorté
Mes sentiments sont très confus.
J’aurai aimé le garder, mais les…

yunni lee

yo aborte. por mi situación económica, por tener otro hijo, porque estudio y…

Fabiola Moreno

I had an abortion when I was 16 years old.

Mary

YO ABORTE CON CYTOTEC, con ayuda de una chica de un grupo de apoyo de méxico.

Imgoingtobeokay

It's 2:25AM as I write this. I had two pills of misoprostol at 11PM. Been…