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I decided to have an abortion, it wasnt easy but it was the best decision

2008

The feelings that came after that were of sadness and dispair, but with the loving support of my sister and boyfriend i was able to overcome them. I do feel sad sometimes for what i did, but i still dont regret it because i dont know where i would be right now if i hadnt done it. We are in our total right to decide wether to have a kid or give it up, its our life, and its our body, even if society does not agree with it, I know what is best for me and i wont let the government decide that for me. Now i am more responsible and value much more my relationship with my boyfriend, he is just awesome and i love him as much as he loves me.

It was the most traumatizing experience in my life. I was about 8 weeks pregnant, i had a surgery done, but they didnt use any anesthesia. The doctor was really nice until the day of the abortion, I went into his office and paid him before the procedure, he counted the money and took me to this not very clean room. they were getting me ready and i got really nervous cuz only then i realized that they were not gonna use any kind of anesthesia. It was the most painful thing i've ever had to go through!, The doctor started yelling at me and telling me to shut up and calm down. I was in such a pain that all my muscles started to contract, to the point that i felt no blood could circulate through my face. After maybe 10 minutes of the procedure they took me to another room and let me rest there for a while, after that they pretty much kicked me out and told me that the place wasnt a hotel and that i needed to leave. thank god i didnt get any infections or anything like that, but i did felt really week for the next couple of days. It costed me around 200 dollars (in ecuador that is a lot!) The only thing i truly regret is hurting my boyfriend who i love very much, he is so wonderful that he understood everything and didnt talk about this ever again.

I didnt wanna have a kid at the moment, it was my second chance to make things right and there was no way i could have a kid. I was very unstable emotionally also.

Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?

The whole ilegal status did afect me emotionaly, i felt that i was doing something wrong by deciding over my body and my life. It shouldn't be that way

How did other people react to your abortion?

The only persons who knew about it were my sister and my boyfriend, who were very suportive due to the things i was going through at that moment. I had gotten out of a really big legal problem and i was about to put my life back on track, I was about to go to my sophomore year in college thanks to my parent's support, but if they had found out i was pregnant that would have been the end of my career. I got pregnant in a really bad state, i was drunk and i can barely remember anything, i didnt know until i was about 7 weeks pregnant. I felt so bad cuz i thought it was my bf's, but it wasnt(i didnt know this till later on), i just didnt want that kid.

Angel

Nunca me senti tão sozinha

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