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My abortions defined my life choices for decades

1986 Amerika Birleşik Devletleri

I was “that” girl that everyone didn’t want to be friends with and having been raised in a very dysfunctional family where no love was expressed physically I validated myself by having sex with men. I was rejected by most men unless they wanted sex from me and I naively played with fire. I had my first abortion at age 22 and my second at age 23, both in clinics that I found in the phone book. I told no one, except for one person who knew me and my family situation. It took me decades to process what happened to me because I was unaware of how to get support and I didn’t feel safe revealing this to anyone. My career choices and educational goals were affected by both my abortions and I’ve never had a functional romantic relationship workout. The shame of having an abortion, combined with the lack of community and family support as well as constant denial of my emontions led me down a path of needing an outlet for my pain and anger-so I put my energies into sports. I had always been a gifted athlete and I spent my entire later 20’s getting a college degree and pursuing athletics. Society defines women as “good” or “bad” and in many countries not having children labels women as sinister, selfish beings. Personally, I don’t trust many women and most men enough to share my history and it takes a great deal of convincing to make me believe a person really would understand my experience or choices. It’s because most people are culturally conditioned to criticize everything women do, how they look and so forth. Now I am 54 and I’m invisible in most parts of society and nobody cares about my reproductivity anymore and all focus is on youth. My thoughts about the world—-I believe that education can create a strong, enlightened culture. We have the potential for a worldwide movement that can save the planet but unfortunately the daily news shows that we are heading in a direction and depleting our resources with reckless abandon, much like I did in my own life leading up to my abortions. I live a quite, monastic life now and am trying to decrease my carbon footprint in the hopes to balance out the overpopulation on our planet. Peace.

Both times were done in a clinic.

I did not want a child and both men told me they weren’t interested in a relationship with me.

Diğer insanlar kürtajınıza nasıl tepki gösterdi?

Rejected me socially and emotionally. I hid it as best as I could but it changed me deeply. I hated myself for years and never had children because of it.

Angela

Pregnancy and abortion - what a trip.

britta

Something that has carried with me ever since.

Gaby

No me arrepiento

EV

I had an abortion and I do not regret my choice. It is very important to me to…

Meg.

Your a strong women!

laMaga

Pense en el bienestar de los 2

Newyor7891

I had an abortion

Maria

Sou dona de mim.

Mulher

Uma escolha pra vida!

María

Mirar hacia adelante.

deedee

한국에 계신 분들 걱정마십쇼!! 낙심하시 마시고 자신을 믿으세요!

Ale

Muy difícil decisión

Samantha

Grow Yourself, Before You Grow a Baby.

Luka

Hice lo mejor que pude, estando bajo toda la presión del mundo.

Ana Lu

e vida nova pela frente...

Natasha

I had come off the contraceptive pill as it had me feeling un well, we thought…

Daniela

My perception of so many things changed a lot with this experience and realised…