Ny

I just had my 3rd son 4 months prior finding out I was pregnant. I got a restraining order against the father 2 months prior finding out I was pregnant. I got verbally abused and car stolen a month before finding out I was pregnant. After 6 years and 2 children I would think I wanted better for myself but I guess I don't but I didn't have his daughter. I wanted a girl so bad but I had an abortion. Hopefully I can find a man that doesn't abuse me and know how to be patient with me because of what he did. I had an abortion because I wanted better for my daughter even if I think I don't for myself.

2020 United States

disappointed selfish in doubt ashamed guilty sad

with medicines by myself

It was unreal. I expected the pain and blood but I didn't comes to terms with what I was giving up. Until my daughter at 9 weeks and 3 days laid on my right thumb under my tattoo of my first name. The feelings when our eyes connected was terrifying. Such a dark and scary time to have to flush down the daughter I always wanted down the toilet. I didn't expect to see the fetus but I did. I couldn't do anything but scream then quickly cover my mouth because in the next room was my 3 son's and the niece of my children's father. He still doesn't know or I haven't told him that I terminated that pregnancy.

financial issues problems with my relationship family size

Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?

No

How did other people react to your abortion?

I only told 5 people. None which are blood related. They were supportive knowing the history of my relationship.

legal